When A Land Mine Explodes

So - do I love God's sense of humor, or what? One day he gives me a really neat thought and helps me turn it into a kind of cool poem (see my previous post: "Dancing Through the Land Mines"). And so what happens next? One of those darned land mines goes and explodes as I'm jitter-bugging my way through them.

The very next day I dropped my new phone in the water - the toilet - to be specific. And it was my own carelessness that caused it, which didn't make me feel a bit better, by the way. This happened on the same day I came home at noon and discovered that the work being done in my apartment was not only incomplete, but would remain so through the weekend I had company coming, leaving sheet rock dust on everything, plastic covered furniture, and me with no heat.

I was a bit surprised and taken aback by the strength of my feelings over all of this. I was SO disappointed for being careless when I know I'm hard on phones. I was SO unhappy and disgusted with myself that I had taken my phone out of its protective case for the simple (and ultimately stupid) reason that is is easier to text on that way - and besides it looks way more cool out of the case. (Had I left it in the case, it wouldn't have been in my back pocket, and thus able to slide so easily into the water in the first place.)

And I found I was SO very angry at my landlords for neglecting to keep their word and finish the work on my apartment. I was embarrased to have my company walk into my place - and find it in disarray instead of all clean and cute like I had planned.

But you know what? I didn't drink over any of it. I felt like it for the barest of moments, but easily made the choice not to. And now I am choosing to deal with my broken phone and live with the consequences of my own actions - without having to beat myself up over them. It was careless and silly of me to take the phone out of its case - but not the end of the world. And doing so doesn't make me a bad person - just a person with a phone that currently makes some really strange noises and with a touch screen that isn't working too well. I can live with that I guess.

And as far as the apartment? I actually did something proactive instead of just wallowing in the anger! I expressed how irritated I was to my friend, and then I called the after hours maintenance number and registered my complaint. I find that I am pleased with my choice to do so - even though calling and complaining is way outside of my comfort zone. I don't know if it will be completely finished today or not - but I can always call again if it isn't.

Anyway, maybe I need to dance with a little ligher step - I could try a Waltz for a few days - instead of the Charleston. And I guess I can be thankful I wasn't doing the Salsa!

Thanks for listening! Caro