Bits and Pieces

What a whirlwind this has been. Today I returned to work for the first time since Cliff’s surgery and have been running non-stop since my feet hit the floor this morning.  I have hardly had a moment to catch my breath.  Cliff has been recovering well, although he caught a bad cold while in the hospital the second time and his cough has kept us all up at night. Coughing when you have recently had open heart surgery is just not fun. But he is on the mend and I’m pretty sure my biggest problem now is going to be making him get enough rest.

Somewhere in the middle of all of this, I developed a severe infection in my jaw and had to drive back to Portland to have “emergency” root canals last Wednesday—three of them. It has not been a fun experience without pain meds. But because of my history, I try to stay away from those.  Last Wednesday, as I was sitting in the specialist’s chair waiting for the anesthetic to take effect, I began to feel just a little sorry for myself.

I have been pretty much living out of a chair in ICU, have been on an emotional roller coaster and sleep deprived for three weeks. I have been caring for my very sick husband, as well as providing comfort for our kids and grandkids, and just trying to keep up on all the day to day stuff at the same time.  I had to give up my dream of going back to school, temporarily – but it hurt to drop out of classes I was so excited over, and I kind of figured I had really just about had enough.

But before the self pity got too bad, I was suddenly overcome with the humor of it all. As I walked out of the doctor’s office, with the left side of my face so swollen it looked like I had the mumps, I got a glimpse of the two of us reflected in a window. (Cliff had ridden along to keep me company.) He was holding his bright red heart pillow to his chest to stifle a cough and I had my hand to the side of my swollen face.  I just had to burst out laughing at how absolutely pathetic we looked.  And in that moment, I knew everything was going to be okay.  

After all, God never promises that all aspects of our lives will make perfect sense all the time. But he does walk with us through the parts that that are confusing and scary and downright painful.  And sometimes, he even reminds us to laugh at ourselves. I am thankful we are both alive and able to enjoy these funny, if ridiculous, moments together. Today, life—all the bits and pieces of it—is good.

Thanks for listening, and God bless you all for your care and prayers. Caro